UK to export £45m's worth of pig semen to China

Apologies if you just choked on your suspiciously frothy coffee

In news that will one day stand as one of the greatest moments in British industrial history, the UK Government has announced that it has cut a deal with China to export £45m of pig semen.

Commencing from January the deal is sure to help 2014 go with a bang for Britain’s suidae, that’s pig to you and me, community.

Home to half the world’s pig community, China’s political elite had growing concern that their mobile-crackling supply was slipping in quality and required a robust injection of new, errm, blood.

News that the heroes of Britain’s sausage industry were saddling up to save their Chinese cousin’s bacon was met was enthusiasm by Whitehall’s own mandarins.

“We’re doing all we can to ensure that businesses up and down the country reap the rewards from our relationship with China” commented a government spokesperson “And that includes our pig farmers”, before calling the deal a “multi-million pound boost for Britain and a gastronomic treat for Chinese diners”.

The good news for Chinese pork fans didn’t end there with the government adding that British pig trotters would also be gracing Bejing’s finest tables. Never in the field, or factory farm, of British industry has so much been owed by so many to so few.

Rebecca Loos was unavailable to comment.

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Comments

1. Lou Gutheil says:

   December 4, 2013 at 1:37 pm

   This has to be the leading candidate for ADVFN Article of the Year!

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